On Writing Mindanao Fictions

Nonfiction by , , | April 10, 2023

Elizabeth Joy Serrano-Quijano:

Born, raised, and educated in Mindanao, I do not think of Mindanao as stationary. In my stories, I see Mindanao as a concept, I write the stories of the people of Mindanao from my associations, dialogues, interviews, and life with them. Mindanao is so diverse; Davao del Sur cannot claim Mindanao or represent the whole of Mindanao, nor any city represent the totality of Mindanao. I write only a portion of Mindanao, which is why I am very conscious when I represent my cultural community, the Blaan. I specify that I am a Blaan from Davao del Sur to respect the diversity among the Blaans in other provinces such as South Cotabato, Sarangani, Davao Occidental, and General Santos City. Mindanao is multifaceted, dynamic, and very mobile—like a melting pot of the many cultures, including settlers. My mother’s parents were Ibalois from La Trinidad, Benguet who migrated to Davao del Sur in the 1950s. Thus, growing up with my diverse roots, I am aware of the picture of Mindanao in my mind. We (the indigenous people) share Mindanao with our Muslim brothers and sisters, as well as settlers from Luzon and Visayas.

According to the founders of the research center Mindanawon Initiatives for Cultural Dialogue, a Mindanawon consciousness “asserts and celebrates diverse identities and the integrity of creation,” and thus, is a partner of the indigenous peoples in creating a real picture of Mindanao. They are advocates who share the same passion in promoting and protecting our right to self-determination. Data from the National Commission on Indigenous Peoples (NCIP) in 2012 show that sixty per cent of the Filipino IPs live in Mindanao, a Mindanawon represents what other Filipinos should also stand for, that is, to protect the rights of Mindanaoans, the people who live in Mindanao. Since Mindanao has been portrayed negatively in the media, a Mindanawon knows better. More than an advocate or ally of Mindanaoans, Mindanawons are also fellow Filipinos who believe in the many potentials of Mindanao–culture, arts, tourism, history, people, etc.

On the Free, Prior, and Informed Consent (FPIC) required by the NCIP, some of my fellow indigenous researchers and cultural workers believe that IPs going through the process of securing FPIC is plain irrational. The indigenous writers and researchers must not be treated like outsiders who need to go through the pains and filters of the backbreaking process of the NCIP for researchers and writers. As there are few IP researchers and writers, it would not hurt the Commission to give privileges to IP researchers especially in researching or writing for their own cultural communities. If the FPIC is a safeguard of the indigenous cultural communities, do we need to safeguard our ICCs from ourselves? Perhaps the solution to that is consultation and evaluation/review of the FPIC as a process. Funny that the Commission has given so much attention in red tagging the term “lumad” without even acting on the more pressing issues, including the FPIC, abuses and loopholes in the ownership of ancestral domains, killings of IP leaders, IP education, and promotion of the use of mother tongue. To add, Mother Tongue – Based Multilingual Education (MTB-MLE) is problematic because the IP learners do not have materials written in their mother tongue. In Matanao, Davao del Sur, the materials provided by the Department of Education are all in Sinugbuanong Binisaya. These issues are only few of the real concerns that we call on the NCIP and our Mindanawon allies to act and stand for what is best for Mindanao and its people.

There are promising stories of indigenous people that must be written and read. As a Blaan writer, I am humbled and overwhelmed by the support that I received when I started writing. Today, I give back to my cultural community by helping and empowering the IP youth through conducting workshops and sharing what I have. They say that writing is a privilege and a challenge, especially if you’re a woman and a mother, especially an indigenous woman. I use my little privileges to encourage my fellow indigenous people to stand firm and fight for our rights during this time of misrepresentation and disinformation. We need to represent Mindanao and its stories and faces.

Jade Mark Capiñanes:

Do I consider myself Mindanawon?

The short answer: yes, of course. I’ve lived in Mindanao all my life.

But it’s not that straightforward, is it? So, I also have a long answer.

Take my flash fiction collection How to Grieve. One may say the work isn’t Mindanawon because they don’t heavily feature people and events and things one often associates with Mindanao. Instead of, say, the life of the Lumad or life in Davao under Duterte—which Elizabeth Joy Serrano-Quijano and John Bengan, respectively, deftly depict and deconstruct in their works—my stories revolve around, among others, riding a taxi and counting hotdogs in your Jolly Spaghetti. There’s even only one mention of any geographical marker in the book—Davao City—and it’s in the final story at that. How is that Mindanawon?

There’s no doubt that Serrano-Quijano’s and Bengan’s work are admirable and important, but I’ve always felt there’s something restrictive, even oppressive, in the idea that as a Mindanawon writer I must only write about people and events and things one—usually one not living here—often associates with Mindanao. But I can’t write like Serrano-Quijano and Bengan. Why? Simply because I’m not them. What I’m trying to say is that living as a Blaan or living in constant fear of the Davao Death Squad are Mindanawon, but Mindanawons can also have emotional breakdowns in the taxi or in front of their spaghetti.

I’d also like to think that my being Mindanawon reveals itself not in the content but in the form of my writings. Isn’t the way a writer structures their stories a direct result or manifestation of the kind of language or reality they’re living in?

My mother has Mandaya and Kagan blood. My father’s Ilonggo. I can’t speak my mother’s language, and I learned my father’s only when I was a teenager. As a Catholic child raised in a Tausug community in Davao City, I expressed myself in Binisaya and Tausug. Today I still speak all the languages I mentioned, but I write and think mostly in English or Filipino or a peculiar mixture of both. And if you live in Mindanao, you’ll know this linguistic and cultural diversity and hybridity aren’t uncommon.

Thus, instead of thinking of Mindanawon identity as something pure or singular, I think of mine as something provisional and improvisational. When I was at a family reunion on my father’s side a few years ago, for example, my brain automatically went Hiligaynon mode. On the other hand, when I’m talking to my students, who are Gen Z and Davao “conyos,” I also catch myself speaking their language, which I can only describe as like honey flowing on sandpaper.

Similarly, when I wrote the stories in How to Grieve, my primary consideration was the form each story must take on: in what “language” can I best express the story? That’s why, if you read my book—please do—you’ll find a few traditionally constructed narratives, but you’ll also come across a how-to article, a list, a letter, a questionnaire, an advice column, a koan, a lyric, or an academic passage or a combination of both, etc.

This kind of fluidity—this sort of constant transformation or translation—is what defines my identity and what’s at the heart of my work. And this is what makes me Mindanawon.

John Bengan:

The stories in Armor are based on my own experiences of living in Davao City from the mid ’90s to the 2000s. I am also queer, and so many of the characters in the stories are queer, trying to navigate a specifically local queer experience or being a “bayot” in a place like Davao. A small-time drug dealer wants to compete in another Miss Gay pageant, even if he might get assassinated. A high school boy discovers mIRC and commits what these days is called “catfishing.” A young man in the university begins a relationship with someone he meets at the men’s dorm; meanwhile his father, who has been missing for years, may have been executed. While they have personal troubles, they also live in a strange environment: they find themselves in a supposedly peaceful place where violence occurs every day. I’m referring to the summary killings that happened in those two decades.

While writing, I was quite aware of the fact that I was setting the stories in Davao. The place in the stories is not exactly Davao City, of course, because it is fictive, imagined. But at the same time, the stories are informed by an insight into a real place. I was not born here; my family moved to Davao when I was very young.  In the first three stories in Armor—“Higher Orders,” “At the River,” “Slaughter Story”—I was trying to reconcile how I’m adapting to a new home with how I’m seeing the place from this position of having just arrived, the shock of encounter between a landscape and myself.

It took me seventeen years to write this book, and so when I was writing the rest of the stories, I already had an understanding of what it means to write about Mindanao. The histories of Mindanao, its growth, its continuing struggles, I would see, influence our literature. I’d become aware that these conflicts don’t happen in isolation; they are connected. History doesn’t really pass. It’s not really in the past. I had this in mind when I worked on the stories. For instance, I wrote a story about kids rapping about the killings as a solution to crime. This is actually true. I met these kids a few years ago while eating kebab somewhere downtown. I tried to consider what kind of behavior a character would have, what decisions they would make in particular scenarios if they were exposed to this reality.

Later, I was able to read stories by authors from Davao and other places in Mindanao. At the beginning, I didn’t really see a link with other writers. It was only later, when I got to read their work, that I recognized the resemblance; they turned their attention to how political volatility clashes with quotidian lives. I’m thinking of Macario D. Tiu’s young guerrillas in his book Sky Rose, Aida Rivera-Ford’s stories about settler girls and women, or stories like Anthony Tan’s “The Cargo,” which is about a man who sees that the cost of survival in their village is revenge. I’d like to imagine that my fiction responds to these works. I would agree if someone said that what I write is “Mindanao fiction.” The stories do reference a part of Davao’s history.

The time Armor covers was some time ago, but I feel that little has changed. Maybe there are signs of change, or “progress,” in the form of new buildings here, road constructions there—Davao was less dusty then, definitely less congested—but the killings never stopped. What happened in the last six years grabbed the nation’s attention and put Davao in everyone’s frequency for a different reason. What I saw then was that people here had been inured to the violence. We’ve now seen an entire country getting desensitized. There is outrage, but there’s plenty of condoning.

However, if there is a fiction about Mindanao that I want to write against, it’s the one about people here being blind followers. This book is my way of bearing witness to the things that have confounded, horrified, or saddened me about living here, but also the moments that made me cautiously hopeful, because when you read the stories, you’ll see that the characters have a lot of drive and attitude, even when they are facing great danger.

_____________________

EDITOR’S NOTE:

Under the auspices of the independent publisher Everything’s Fine, the Davao Writers Guild participated in the Mindanao Book Fair held in Abreeza Mall on March 17-19, 2023. On March 19, we held a panel entitled “Mindanao Fictions” featuring John Bengan (Armor, 2022, Ateneo de Manila University Press), Elizabeth Joy Serrano-Quijano (Dili Pwede Mogawas ug ubang mga Sugilanon, 2022, Ateneo de Davao University), and Jade Mark Capiñanes (How to Grieve, 2022, Everything’s Fine). Moderated by DWG President Jhoanna Lynn Cruz, the authors discussed how they engage with Mindanao as the site of their creativity and vision. Watch the video archive here: https://youtu.be/GGKRbg9tGeY

Urban Embrace

Poetry by | March 27, 2023

July noon, the city laid bare below an endless sheet of blue,
Davao’s downtown sprawl naked, its dusty urban flesh
crisscrossed with the implicit loom of wires,
Corrugated walls rust-colored like lipstick stains, or bruises.
Summer light, smoke scent, the siren call of engines—
These all add to the texture of cacophony,
The all-encompassing weight of a city onto the senses.
In this purgatory light of noon the world itself is unclothed,
Burnt by cloudless horizon, its sounds and stains uncovered
Without shame, without secrets,
Even when its embrace makes it difficult to breathe.

***

Tara Yakob Montiflor is a graduate of BA English (cum laude) from the University of the Philippines Mindanao, a Best Thesis Finalist for their poetry collection “The Streets will Not Embrace You.”

T. Wannee (Part 3)

Fiction by | March 27, 2023

Gaakal ang amoang class schedule sa tibuok semester. Diri man gud diay sa Thailand, isagol nila ang regular ug students with special needs. Ibutang ta, naay tulo o lima ka estudyante nga special. Pun-an pa sa 35 ka regular unya magdungan ni silag salida — mora gyod kag mayawaan. Naay magdagan-dagan libot sa klasehanan. Naa puy mokalit lang og tibi unya motiyabaw sa way daghang rason. Lahi pod ng magsirko-sirko sa imohang atubangan. Dayon duna puy lain nga magsigeg tahal sa iyang lapis hangtod kini mapudpod. Unya kani nga istilo nila ilabi na og matunong ka og First Period sa hapon, magsunod ni sila og pananghid nga moadto sa pansayan. Inosente pud tawon tang nitugot sa ilahang gipangayo. Dakong kahibulong nako nga taud-taod naman wala pa man nahibalik. Ug sa dihang akong giapas, nakit-an nako didto nga gadula ug gasinabligay og tubig. Nakaingon gyod kos akong kaugalingon og unsa ni silang klaseha sa mga mananap. Mayawaan gyod diay tuod ka. Bantog ra niana akong mga kauban nga mag-andam gyud sa gira kay lahi ni silag timplada. Tinuod gyod diay tong ilahang giingon nga Lunes pa lang, maluya ug mapagaw naka. Bantog ra pud diay nga dunay koy usa ka kaubang Pinoy nga gabalon permi og luy-a ug unsa pa tong klaseha sa habak ug panawal sa kalawasan. Panagang diay to niya aron dugay siyang malup-og.

Kabahin ni T. Wannee, nakabantay ko nga bugnaw ang iyang tinagdan nako sa unang semana sa akong pagtudlo. Paminaw nako, naniid kini sa akong batasan ug gawi ilabi na sa paagi sa akong pagtudlo. “Nakamenos man tingali ni nako si T. Wannee tungod kay dili ko Native English Speaker o NES. Bahala uroy siya sa iyang uray. Basta ako, magpadayon ko sa akong misyon diri” pag-alam-alam nako sa akong kaugalingon. Dili nako ikaulaw sa pag-angkon nga dunay mga higayon nga mokalit lang og tulo akong mga luha. Tingali agi sa akong kahiubos sa  akong pares. O kaha, agi pod sa kamingaw sa akong mga minahal sa kinabuhi nga nahibilin sa Cebu. Kamingaw, ilabi na gyod sa akong pinangga nga inahan nga maoy nagtuboy ug wala gyod gaduhaduha pagpugong kanako nga mangempleyo sa laing nasud.

“Master Glenn, you do traffic duty now!” pinabundak nga sugo ni T. Wannee sa akua samtang gapuliki kog check sa test papers. Apil man sa amoang tahas kada alas kwatro sa hapon ang pagbantay sa trapiko sa sulod-gawas nga mga pribadong sakyanan nga gimaneho sa ginikanan o bantay sa mga bantay. Mao pod ni ang oras nga tingpanguli nila. Ang klase sa prathom mahuman inig alas tres sa hapon. Dayon naa silay usa ka oras nga igahin para sa nagkadaiyang club. Wala ko kamatikod nga oras naman diay aron moabag ko sa mga Tayutay nga mangulohan pagka traffic enforcer. Oras pud ni sa laing papel namo aron mag-yaya ug yoyo. Tuod man, akong nasaksihan ang mga bata nga morag nagkadaiyang klase sa mananap nga nakabuhi sa kuwadra.

Naandan na nako ang maong bulohaton. Mausab lang kini kon adunay laing importanteng isugo nako si T. Wannee. Sama pananglitan kon naay umaabot nga English InterSchool Competition diin akoy patudluon niya og Extemporaneous Speech, Oration, o Spelling Bee sa amoang mga representante.

Katapusang semana sa Septiyembre, nagpahigayon og field trip ang Prathom 6. Adunay gigahin nga tagsa-tagsa ka mga bus ang matag seksyon diin ang class advisers maoy mangunay sa pag-uban ug monitor sa ilahang hinsakopan. Human namo napahimutang ang tanang mga bata ug wala nay mga kakulangon, padulong nako lingkod sa akuang pwesto duol sa drayber.

“Master Glenn, you sit beside me” maabi-abihong pagtawag ni T. Wannee nako. Tuod man, isip pagtahod kaniya ug sa mainitong imbitasyon, gidawat ko kini. Ang amoa diayng lamisa sa lawak-tunghaanan ni T. Wannee tapad ug buyon ra. Gamay ra ang gintang sa kalay-on niini. Apan bisan pa man sa maong sitwasyon sulod sa upat ka bulan, aduna gihapon koy kahingawa. Lahi ning kahimtanga karon. Magtapad mig lingkod sulod sa pipila ka mga oras. Usa pa, walay daghang babil tali namong duha.

“Tabang tanang mga Angheles ug Santos sa kalangitan! Tabang tanang mga kalag sa purgatoryo!!!” pangaliya nakog taman nga ako ra puy makadungog sa dihang nilingkod nako tapad ni T. Wannee.

Didto inanay nga gipaambit niya ang mabulokon nga tipik sa iyang kinabuhi. Nagdako siyang ilo ug maoy namat-an sa iyang buot ang pagpadako kaniya sa mga madre. Niya pa, pinikito ug inihap ang iyang lihok didto sa kumbento. Isip pagtan-aw nga dakong utang kabubut-on sa pagpadako, pagbuhi, ug pag-alima kaniya — giduphan niya ang maong bokasyon. Apan makadiyot ra ang iyang pagdawat sa papel isip kapikas ni Hesus tungod sa iyang sakit. Wala na niya gisugid kon unsa ning klaseha. Wala pod ko nangutana kay igo ra kong naminaw sa iyang pagpaambit. Tungod sa giaguman niyang sakit, nibiya siya sa iyang pagkamadre. Ug nakahukom nga magtudlo. Mathematics gyud iyang major pag college ug dili English. Dugang pa niya, nakita sa tag-iya ang talagsaon niyang hiyas sa pagtudlo ingon man usab ang kahaniti niya sa pag-Iningles. Gawas pa nga pinaagi sa maayo niyang pagpangulo sa SMGSP, kanunay kini nga makadawat sa nagkadaiyang klase sa pasidungog. Usa na niini ang kanunay nga pag-una sa listahan sa tinuig nga Ordinary National Educational Test kon O-NET nga pagasalmutan sa tanang tinun-an sa Prathom 6, Mathayom 3 ug 6. Mora pud ni og National Achievement Test o NAT sa atua. Dili momenos sa 95% ang overall performance rating sa maong tunghaan. Ang way samang dedikasyon ug ang paglaban sa dungog sa SMGSP mao gyuy pinakadakong rason  og nganong dili gyod buhian sa tag-iya si T. Wannee. Baynte ka tuig na diay siyang gatudlo sukad sa among panagkauban.

Samtang padayong gadagan ang gisakyan namong bus, padayon pod sa pag-asoy ang akong pares. Gisultian ko niya sa mga kanhi nakauban na niya nga Pinoy ug ang dili niya malimtan nga mga kasinatian uban nila. Ubay-ubay napod diay nga mga nasud ang iyang naadtuan. Daghan napod siyang nahimamat nga nagkadaiyang klase sa rasa. Apan usa sa mga wala nako damha nga gipaambit niya mao ang pagpakita sa hulagway sa iyang kanhi kapuyo nga farang. Usa kini ka retired US Army. Gipakita dayon niya sa akua ang pipila ka mga litrato nilang duha nga naa sa iyang selpon. Gikan ang maong hulagway sa una nilang panagkita sa Pattaya. Sweet kaayo silang duha. Kon hukman mo ang maong talan-awon, makaingon ka nga gikan ga-honeymoon.

Gitutokan ko ni T. Wannee. Dayag ang kaseryoso sa iyang nawong. Morag gisukod niya akong katakos. Nisugod og lagubo ang akong dughan kay basig mitukar napud iyang uray. Nikalit dayon kini og pahiyom. Laing klase sa Thai smile nga kato pa nako nabatyagan. Ang maong pahiyom daw sama katam-is sa dugos sa putyokan. Ug unya, iyang gipaak ang ubos ug pula niyang ngabil. Nagpitok-pitok iyang mga mata morag tamsi nga bag-ong natughan.

“Good guys go to heaven. Bad guys go to Pattaya. Are you bad, Master Glenn?”

Si Gerwin Vic Evarretta Bhuyo usa ka magtutudlo nga OFW sa Bangkok, Thailand. Kinaham niya ang pagkuha og mga hulagway, pagsulat og balak ug sugilanon. Kon walay kakulian, magyampungad ni siya sa mga ipahigayong book sale event.

T. Wannee (Part 2)

Fiction by | March 20, 2023

Natunong to nga wala koy klase sa First Period ug siya ang sa unang nitudlo sa Prathom 6/1 nga mao puy iyang advisory. Kani diayng Prathom 5 ug 6 nga akong pagatudluan, adunay lima ka seksyon matag grado. Ug ang kada seksyon adunay 35 ngadto sa 40 ka mga estudyante.

Samtang gasulat og writing exercises sa pisara si T. Wannee aron pagakopyahon ug pagatubagon sa iyang mga tinun-an, adunay usa ka tambokikoy nga lalaki nga nagmugna pud og iyang salida. Ungas kaayo ni og panagway. Makaingon ka nga mahimo ning barumbado bataa kon dili magtarong og eskweyla. Gapunay kini og pangdistorbo sa iyang mga kasaring. Kon dili kuwaderno, bolpen ang kuhaon niini. Usahay pud, maggama kini og papel nga eroplano ug unya ipalupad padulong sa iyang target. Mahikurat nalang tawon ang nagdiniyos og kopya kay adunay nihagsa nga abyon sa iyang nawong.

Duna puy higayon nga nagpakita kini sa iyang abilidad nga daw nagpalupad siya og tabanog. Sa makadaghang higayon, gisaka-kanaog niya iyang wala nga kamot. Inay nga gikumo,  nihimog dakong lungag ang maong kamot timailhan nga naghawid siya og lambo. Apan sukwahi sa iyang panagway ang imong masaksihan. Mora man kini og gilamian. Kon buot hunahunaon, gapalupad raman unta siya og tabanog. Kanus-a gud mahitabo nga mosulirap ang mata sa magpalupad og tabanog? Tuod man, nasaba ug naukay ang tibuok klase.

Nihatag og unang warning si T. Wannee pinagi sa pagpahilom kanila samtang padayon kining gasulat. Naigking ug nahilom ang tanan kay daw sama siya sa usa ka kumander nga nimando sa iyang batalyon. Naundang pud ang tambokikoy sa iyang pasundayag. Modagan pod og singko minutos diin ang imuhang madunggan sulod sa maong lawak-saringanan mao lamang ang pagpakli sa panid sa kuwaderno. O kaha ang diyotay nga agiot sa lamesa ug lingkuranan sa mga tinun-an.

Gitan-aw dayon kos tambokikoy nga nagbungisngis sama sa irong buang samtang naglingkod kini. Nidali og sulat sa papel gamit ang asul nga marker pen ug iyang gipabasa nako, ‘C H A K W O W’.

Nikunot akong agtang kay wala ko kasabot sa iyang gisulat. Abtik kaayo niyang nabasa akong ekspresyon. Nibalik kini pag-arte sa pagpalupad og tabanog uban sa pagsulirap sa iyang mga mata. Niining higayona, gapanilap pa ang tunto!

Wala pa niirog og ikaunom nga minuto, nibalik napod sa naandang pagbinuang ang tambokikoy. Niining higayona, laing binuhat napud iyang gibiktima. Nasaba napod pagbalik ang maong klase. Hastang agik-ik sa tambokikoy nga morag gigitik sa dili ingon nato.

Ug sa ikaduhang higayon, gibadlong napod sila pagbalik ni T. Wannee. Kon unsa kaisog ang unang pagbadlong, nisamot kini. Natul-id ug nitisar ang tanan. Apan ang tambokikoy gakinengkoy. Giawat niini ang postura sa maestra samtang padayon kining gasulat. Nindot ra ba kaayo og agi si T. Wannee. Bugnaw ug hamugaway sa panan-aw ang iyang pinakatay. “Smooth as Thai silk”, matod pa.

Tungod sa klase sa salida nga gipakita sa tambokikoy, nagmuok-muok og katawa ang kadaghan sa mga tinun-an. Hilabihan niyang kurata kay kalit nga nihagsa ug nilagapak ang papas sa walang bahin sa iyang liog. Nagkamurecheng iyang nawong ug nagkatisas ang unipormeng puti nga adunay mubo nga manggas ug asul nga shorts.

Didto nako unang nasaksihan ang kabangis ni T. Wannee. Nisiga iyang mata sa hilabihang kasuko. Girapido niyag pasa-Thai ang tambokikoy. Wala koy kabangkaagan sa ilahang pinulongan. Dili gani ko kahibalo mobasa ug mosulat aning ilahang alpabeto nga murag bitok gahiko-hiko. Apan sa gipakitang gawi ni T. Wannee, mora gyud siya’g gipanulayan sa tumang kasuko.

Abi nakog mohilom ang tambokikoy. O kaha mangayo og pasaylo. Kay sa kulturang Tayutay, daw sama sa monghe ang ilahang pagtahud sa magtutudlo. Naunsa ba nga nitubag ug nitibad man hinuon kini kang T. Wannee. Gidali dayon niya pag-adto ang tibaran sa iyang nahimutangan nga padulong ng molingkod. Gidapog niya ang likod niini. Kusog kaayo. Nilagubo gud. Morag nataktak ang baga.

Apan wala matandog ang tambokikoy. Padayon gihapon siya sa iyang pagtibad. Gapungasi kini sanglit napakgang man ang iyang pasundayag. Nakigtigi man hinuon siya sa pagyawyawa sa maestra.

Gipangayo ni T. Wannee ang duha niya ka kamot ug gipalpal pag-ayo gamit ang plastic apan mabawog nga klase sa ruler. Ug sa pagpalpal niya, durong muro sa tambokikoy. Bahi kaayo. Kublan. Naluya nalang siya og pinalpal apan wala gyud maparog ang tampalasan nga tinun-an.

Kon wala ko masayop, morag kanapulo gyud to kahigayon nga gidurog palpal ni T. Wannee ang iyang mga kamot. Gihangos si T. Wannee human siya nayawaan. Makaingon gyod kog nayawaan kay nawala iyang katahom. Unya nag-apol-apol sa kapula ang tibuok niyang nawong. Gihangos ang akong kauban human sa gihimo niyang talagsaong klase sa paugnat sa kusog nga nakapaigking nako. Nakurat ko sa maong panghitabo nga nikilab sa akong panan-aw. Tiaw mo ba ng unang adlaw pa sa klase unya mao natoy akong nasaksihan. Wala gyod gaduhaduha si T. Wannee sa pagsalida sa akong atubangan uban ang buhing saksi nga 40 ka mga tinun-an. Sa akong kakurat, nakahigop kog kalit sa gaaso pa sa kainit nga Kafae Boran, tradisyunal nga klase sa kape nga namugna panahon sa Unang Gira sa Kalibotan. Ang maong kape naa sa gwapa kaayo nga seramikong tasa gikan pa sa Lampang. Maayo nalang kay wa nako nabugwak sa dapit nga nahimutangan sa duha. Unsaon nalang kon maingon. Basig apilon pod kog palpal ni T. Wannee.

Human makatilaw ang tambokikoy sa kamangtas ni T. Wannee, napuyo na kini. Gamuro siya pag-ayo. Ang simod morag kasang-atan og kaldero tungod sa hilabihang pagkusmod. Sa wala pa nibalik si T. Wannee atubangan sa lawak-saringanan aron magpadayon og sulat, nipasiatab kini og litanya. Ambot og unsay pasabot sa iyang gilitanya. Pero dili ko makalimot sa iyang panapos nga gimando, “Niyap!” o Hilom! kon sa ato pa. Nangutana dayon ko sa usa ka tinun-an kung unsay pasabot ato sa dihang nigawas kadiyot si T. Wannee. Nagtigom tingali tog igong hangin aron ibuga kon motukar napod ang kabail sa tambokikoy.

Nabunyagan ang akong unang adlaw sa klase sa kulbahinam nga salida tali nilang T. Wannee ug sa tambokikoy. Unang adlaw pa lang gani, nisugod na dayon silag arangkada. Abi ko  man og ang maong klase sa pagdisiplina sa magtutudlo-tinuan sa atua ra nauso. Ilabi na sa akong panahon kaniadto sa dekada otsenta. Normal ra pod diay na diri sa Siam, ang karaan nga ngalan sa Thailand nga naila pud isip “The Land of the Free” kanhi sila raman ang nasod sa habagatangsidlakan sa Asya nga nakalingkawas sa kolonyal nga hulga sa mga Uropano. Laing bansagon pod sa maong nasud ang “The Land of Smiles”. Pero ayaw ka kay naa koy nabasahan nga aduna diay kini 13 ka klase sa pahiyom. Matod pa nga sila rang mga Tayutay ang nakahibalo sa gapahipi nga kahulogan niini. Dugang pa nga kitang mga langyaw dili gyod mokompyansa kay basig kapaakon na diay ang nitibo nga nipahiyom kanato.

Gipangomusta dayon kos mga kaubanang Pinoy sa akong unang adlaw sa dihang gabaklay mi pauli padulong sa staff house. Giasoy dayon nako kon unsa ka hugyaw ang panghitabo. Didto nako nasayran nila nga ang tambokikoy mao gyod diay giilang haring-gangis sa kasipat. Bantug rang wala gyoy niako og sukol o badlong sa iyang pagsalida. Prathom 1 pa lang diay ni gasugod sa iyang abilidad. Kapila na kahigayon nga gipatawag ug gihusay kini uban ang iyang ginikanan sa opisina sa prinsipal. Apan ang maong taras magbalik-balik. Kahibalo napod ang tanang daan nga magtutudlo sa elementarya sanglit niagi naman sa ilahang mga kamot ang maong bata. Pero dili ni basta-basta mapalagpot sa maong tunghaan kay anak diay kini sa gamhanan nga pamilya. Ug sa tanang magtutudlo nga Tayutay, si T. Wannee ra gyod ang bugtong makapitol sa iyang kalabad. Gawas pa nga ang akong pares maoy lider sa Prathom 5 ug 6. Siya pod ang usa sa pinakatinahud ug giila nga magtutudlo sa tibuok eskuylahan nga adunay duha ka sanga nga nahimutang sa Sattahip ug Bowin.

Dakong pasalamat nako sa Ginoo nga nakalabang ko sa unang bulan sa pagtudlo kauban si T. Wannee ug ang halos dul-an 400 ka mga tinun-an nga akong gitudloan. Hapit nakong mohural. Tiaw mo ba ng kada adlaw magsige kog check, stamp pad alang sa petsa, unya pirma  sa gapatongpatong nga notebook ug libro. Lupig pay artista sa kadaghan nimog pirmahunon! Pasiaw pa sa mga kaubanan nako, “Makapahulay ra gyod ta ani kong mangihi.”

Si Gerwin Vic Evarretta Bhuyo usa ka magtutudlo nga OFW sa Bangkok, Thailand. Kinaham niya ang pagkuha og mga hulagway, pagsulat og balak ug sugilanon. Kon walay kakulian, magyampungad ni siya sa mga ipahigayong book sale event.

T. Wannee (Part 1)

Fiction by | March 13, 2023

Mayo 4, 2012, unang adlaw nako diri sa Thailand isip usa ka OFW. Kadali ra ba diay sa dagan sa panahon. Morag kanus-a lang man to nga gi-Indiyan ko sa Thai teacher nga gitahasan sa akong agalon aron sugaton ko sa airport. Gisultian ko niya sa katapusang minuto nga dili ko niya matagbo. Nidugang pa siya nga mag-taxi nalang ko gikan sa Suvarnabhumi Airport sa Bangkok padulong sa Pattaya. Tiaw mo ba ng kapin kon kulang 143 kilometro ang biyahion nako sa taxi. Makabayad gyod tingali kog 1,000 baht kon maingon.

Maayo nalang kay gakasinabot ra mi. Matod pa sa akong nadunggang taho, kadaghanan sa mga Thai kay menos gyod mo-Iningles. Dili parehas natong mga Pinoy nga mosukol og sinampangkol nga inistoryahay ilabi nag makasugat ba ron og mga langyaw. Dili gyod moatras og Ininglesay. Modasdas pa gani.

Wala diay ko nisangon sa iyang mando. Nangita kog laing paagi. Niadto ko sa Tourist Service Center aron pagpangayo og dugang kasayoran kon unsay laing masakyan padulong sa Pattaya.

Ang Suvarnabhumi Airport mao ang nag-unang tugpahanan sa ayroplano dinhi sa Thailand. Gani, niadtong 2012, nakuha niini ang pasidungog nga “World’s 6th Best Airport By Size” nga gihatag sa Airports Council International kon ACI. Niadtong tuiga, nakigtigi kini sa laing 17 ka mga airport nga adunay 40 milyon nga mga pasahero.

Ang akua diayng desisyon nga mosulay pagtrabaho dinhi sa Thailand isip usa ka OFW, tungod ni sa sugyot-tampo ug pagdasig ni Nanay Fe.

“Sulayi Dong og trabaho sa Thailand. Daghang Pinoy nga gatudlo didto. Maayo nalang pod magamit imohang Teacher’s license. Kon dili ka makauyon, bisag usa ka tuig lang god ka didto. Pero kon ganahan ka, pwede pod ka magdugay unya mangasawa kag Thai,” matod pa sa akuang inahan nga kanhi English ug History teacher sa usa ka government school. Kay lagi buotan ug masunoron ko nga anak, walay laing gikawilahan o kaha mopugong sa akuang hukom kon uganing mobiya ko sa atuang nasud, nangabkab dayon kos internet.

“English teacher, Filipino, Thailand.” Tuod man, gapusot-pusot dayon ang mga inpormasyon nga nigawas sa akuang monitor.

“Oi, murag nindot ni nga eskuylahan ay: Santa Maria Gorretti School. Ngalan pa lang daan, naa na si Birheng Maria. Dako akuang pagtuo nga usa ni ka Catholic school,” kumpyansa nakong gipamulong. Tuod man, wala gyod ko masayop sa akuang pangagpas. Bisan pa man og usa kini ka Catholic private school, modawat gihapon kini og mga tinun-ang Budhista, Muslim, ug uban pa. Ang maong tulonghaan anaa nahimutang sa Pattaya City, Chonburi.

Nangaykay napod ko og dugang inpormasyon kon asa ni dapita ang Pattaya. Kay kon makadungog na gani ko og Thailand gikan sa mga higala nga nag-tour sa maong nasud, Bangkok ug Phuket dayon ang mapasigarbuhon nilang ipaukyab. Dili ko suhito aning Pattaya. Ug sa akuang pagpadayon og pakigsusi, akong nasayran nga ang maong lugar anaa diay mahimutang sa sidlakang bahin sa Thailand. Unya daghang maanindot nga white sand beaches. Ug usa diay ni sa mga kinaham nga destinasyon sa mga turista gikan sa Uropa ilabi na gyud sa mga Ruso. Bangkok, Phuket, Chiang Mai, Ayutthaya, ug Pattaya — mao diay ni ang “Big Five” tourist attractions sa Thailand. Ang Pattaya naila usab sa bansagon nga “Hawaii of the East.”

Samtang padayon ko sa gihimong pagpangaykay, nasugatan nako ang usa ka hulagway diin adunay usa ka lalaking farang o foreigner, hitsuraan, ug maskulado bisan pa man sa katigulangon niini ang gasul-ob og itom nga t-shirt. Adunay panultihon nga nakapatik sa puti nga  mga letra ang unang duha ka bahin sa linya. Dayon ang nahibiling laing duha ka linya nakaimprinta sa pula nga letra. Ug may desinyo kini nga iconic landmarks imabaw sa maong lugar:

GOOD GUYS GO TO
HEAVEN
BAD GUYS GO TO
PATTAYA

Nahugyaw ko sa makadiyot. Ginganlan pud diay kini og “Sin City.” Nisamot akong kaikag nga makalarga na dayon padulong sa Thailand aron sa pagsusi kon unsa ba gyuy tanghaga aning siyudara. Nag-email dayon kos akong application sa tag-iya sa maong eskuylahan. Motuo ka o sa dili, ang maong tunghaan ra maoy akong gi-aplayan. Wala ko naikag nga mangaplay sa Bangkok kay para nako pareho ra ni sila sa Manila: trapik, bahaunon, nagkadaiyang klase sa polusyon, ug uban pa. Wala nako giseryoso ang maong aplikasyon kay kon kontakon ko sa tag-iya, maayo. Kon dili, okay ra pud. Mabuhi ra bitaw ko diri sa atua.

Sa padayon nako nga pagpangalap, nalakbitan pud nako nga ang opisyal diay nga pangalan sa Bangkok kay Krung Thep Maha Nakhon Amon Rattanakosin Mahinthara Ayuthaya Mahadilok Phop Noppharat Ratchathani Burirom Udomratchaniwet Mahasathan Amon Piman Awatan Sathit Sakkathattiya Witsanukam Prasit. Sa inato pa ug sa hamubong bersiyon, “Siyudad sa mga Anghel.” Gipanag-iya usab niya ang pasidungog isip adunay pinakataas nga ngalan sa lugar sa tibuok kalibotan.

Dangtan lang og duha ka adlaw, nakadawat ko og tubag gikan sa maong eskuylahan. Gipapili ko og adlaw alang sa pagahimoon nga Skype interview. Sa laktod nga pagkaistorya, nadawat ko. Gipadad-an dayon ko og kontrata ug gibatbat didto ang mga angay nakong buhaton aron mahimong legal ang akuang pagpangempleyo.

Isip pagsaulog sa akong ikanapulo nga kasumaran dinhi sa Thailand, buot nakong ipailaila kanimo ang pinakaunang magtutudlo nga Thai diin nahimong kabahin sa akong kinabuhi, si T. Wannee.

Mayo 17, Huwebes. Opisyal nga unang adlaw sa pagbukas sa klase sa halos tibuok tunghaan sa Thailand. Gikan sa anuban o kindergarten hangtud na sa mathayom o secondary. Unang adlaw pod nako sa Santa Maria Gorretti School Pattaya o SMGSP. Kon unsa ko kahinamhinam alang sa unang adlaw sa akong pagtudlo, mao pud ang gibati sa mga estudyante. Pratom o Grades 5 ug 6 ang gisangon nako para sa tuig-tingtungha. English Conversation ang akong itudlo nga magpunting sa Speaking ug Listening unya lakbitan pud og Reading ug Writing skills. Pero akong kaabag nga Thai maoy magtudlo sa English grammar. Ang akong lisensiya sa pagtudlo sa Pilipinas alang sa secondary school. Pero sa dihang personal nakong nakahinabi ang tag-iya sa maong eskuylahan, gipangutana ko niya kon mosugot ra ba ko nga motudlo og prathom sanglit wala pay bakante ang mathayom. Kay lagi tumong ug tinguha nako isip usa ka OFW ang makatrabaho ug dili ang paglulinghayaw, gidawat nako ang maong hagit sa walay daghang pagkusmod.

Sa wala pa diay nako nahimamat ang akong pares nga Tayutay, inato nga angga sa mga nitibo, gipahimatngunan nakong daan sa mga kaubanang Pinoy nga karaan na sa SMGSP nga magbantay kay nabaniog na siya sa tibuok tunghaan nga istrikta, mangtas, bangis, ug terror. Hinuon, giasoy pud nila nga kon dili kuno siya dug-on, maayo kaayo kini motimbaya. Gani, dili siya dalo nga mopaambit sa iyang gibalon nga pagkaon.\

“Good luck Kuya!” matod pa nila. Paminaw nako mora kog si Daniel nga gibahug ngadto sa langob sa liyon.

“Sawasdee T. Wannee,” pasiunang pagtimbaya nako niya isip pagtahud.

“Good morning Master Glenn” tubag niya apan wala kini nitan-aw nako kay aduna siyay gikurikuri sa iyang lamesa. Ambot kon unsa. Basin og gituyo niya kay sayo nisuol iyang takig.

Ang Sawasdee kon Hello maoy naandan nga pagtimbaya sa mga Thai. Ubanan mo ang maong pagtimbaya sa usa ka Wai nga sa kinatibuk-an mao ang pagbutang sa duha ka palad diin ang mga tumoy sa tudlo mohikap o motandog sa ilong. Matod pa, ang Wai nagpakita sa ang-ang sa pagtahod sa laing tawo ug usa ka pag-ila sa magulang niini og pangidaron o kaha isip pagrespeto sa usa ka magulang o senyor sa katungdanan. Sa imong paghatag og Wai, kinahanglang iduko nimo imuhang ulo uban sa pagduot sa imong mga palad timailhan sa pagpakita sa pagtahod. Ang kanhi nahisgutan mao ang unang duha ka klase sa tawo nga hatagan mo sa maong pagtimbaya. Ang ikatulo mao ang Wai alang sa mga monghe isip pagyukbo timaan sa dakong pagtahod. Makahuloganon ug ispesyal ang pagpadayag ug pagbuhat niini ngadto kanila. Human mo diay ibungat ang maong pagtimbaya nga mao pud ni katumbas sa atong ‘Po’ ug ‘Opo’, pakapinan mo kini og Khrap kon ikaw lalaki ug Kha kon ikaw babaye. Alang sa mga hinsakopan sa LGBTQ+, kahibalo naka og unsay ilabtik sa tumoy sa ilahang mga dila.

Mao kadto ang unang panaghimamat namo ni T. Wannee. Sa akong tan-aw, 50 anyos na siya. Pero ayaw ka, mora pa kini og kuwarenta. Dayag ang iyang katahom bisan pa man sa iyang gisul-ob nga uniporme. Puting taas nga manggas nga adunay kwelyo ug itom nga palda. Hapsay pud kaayo ang pagkapangko sa iyang itom ug lumoy nga buhok. Unya sakto ra pud ang gihidhid niya nga pagwapa sa iyang pormag kasingkasing nga nawong. Natural ang kurba ug kalabong sa itom niyang mga kilay ingon man ang gabawod niyang pilok. Medyo taliwtiw ang iyang ilong nga nitakdo ra pud sa kadak-on sa iyang baba. Modan-ag ang kaputi sa iyang panit ilabi na og mabantang kini sa adlaw. Sakto ra pod iyang kaligdong ug pamayhon. Naa tingali kini sa lima ka piye ug upat ka pulgada. Kon wala nagtudlo si T. Wannee, angayan gyod kaayo ni siya mahimong usa ka flight stewardees sa Thai Airways.

Tuod man, tinuod gyod diay ang taho gikan sa mga kaubanan nako. Lahi gyod og birtud si T. Wannee. Nakasaksi gyod ko sa gipakita niyang taras ilabi na sa mga estudyanteng lalaki nga sipat.

Si Gerwin Vic Evarretta Bhuyo usa ka magtutudlo nga OFW sa Bangkok, Thailand. Kinaham niya ang pagkuha og mga hulagway, pagsulat og balak ug sugilanon. Kon walay kakulian, magyampungad ni siya sa mga ipahigayong book sale event.

What Happened in El Mañana (Part 4)

Fiction by | February 26, 2023

When Bri hesitated to wear it, I hurriedly locked myself in the cubicle out of shame. A knock got me out of my thoughts. It was Joey.

“Thanks for the piss. Worked wonders.” Joey put out a thumbs up below the cubicle door as I tried to pace with my breathing. “And by the way, Bri is mad at you because she heard something, not because you’re here or anything like that.”

“Something?” I was curious.

“Something about you having a baby with another woman–” What did Joey just say– “and you walking away from it.”

“Where in the world did you hear that?” I asked.

“Her kababata told her,” Joey said as she dusted the sand off her palms.

“Chris?”

“Yeah, Chris.” Joey went back to the kubo.

I was too taken aback by what I heard that it took me forever to walk back to the kubo. The sun was setting. I was barefooted but I did not mind the sand. When I was near the kubo, I heard Lyn. I felt some kind of relief.

“Yanggg, why won’t you selfie with me, yang?” The tipsy affectionate Lyn was always the first to show up when alcohol hits her. Judging by the bottle on her hand, she was drinking the Soju straight up. I forgot to buy the chaser.

“Yang, take a picture of me baaa.” Lyn pleaded as she became extremely touchy with Bri.

The pep talk I gave Bri was probably working because she was tolerating her mother’s behavior, “I’m not in the mood, ma.”

“Ay uy! I think you don’t love me anymore, Yang. You don’t take pictures of me anymore.”

This was Lyn’s attempt at convincing Bri. I knew how much Lyn loved having her pictures taken, but I thought if I went inside the kubo, Lyn’s attention would be directed to me and not to Bri. This was their bonding time after all. And I was running out of energy to deal with Bri right now, especially from what she thought she knew. Besides, I would have better chances of making amends with Bri when Lyn and her are on good terms. So I decided to stack on the sand that was already on my feet and sat on a bench beside the kubo. That was not so bad

“Babe, palihog gud ko.” Bri asked Joey to take a picture of her and her mother. Joey was happy to do so as she pointed her polaroid and counted for them. As she clicked the button Lyn suddenly brushed the camera off, knocking Joey’s camera into the sand. All Lyn could say was how the flash was too bright.

“Ma, don’t be a maoy,” Bri said in a gentle but firm voice.

“Why’d you have to bring her here… You’re always together.” Lyn was making faces and she uttered, “Can’t you see I’m jealous?”

“Joey offered me a ride here, and I don’t want her to drive in the dark so I made her stay.”

Bri probably was probably tired of answering. So her deep sighs served as a response. She even had her mother’s temper. Joey got the cue and tried to console Lyn.

“I’d shower first na lang po, tita, so you and Bri could talk.”

 Joey stood up and grabbed her towel. Bri wanted the both of them to just go at the same time, but Joey insisted on going first. I guess their bickering ticked something inside Lyn’s head, “No, no, no, no.”

“That’s it. I’m out of here.”

Bri walked out of the kubo grabbing Joey’s hand when Lyn got a hold of Joey and hugged her, “I’m not against you… I just want some time with my daughter. But you’re here.”

“Ma, enough,” Bri asserted. “I could say the same thing with Bud.”

 “So you’d go there, Yang?” Lyn said as Joey wiggled her way out of her arms. “You don’t know him.”

 “Well, you don’t know him well enough,” Bri said. Joey tried stopping her but not before she blurted something out.

“Did you know he ran away from his baby?”

That was it. I was at my third layer of sand castle when I heard that. I interrupted, still sitting on the sand.

“Nonsense!” I said. “The only baby I have is your mom.”

“Could you take anything seriously?”

“I am taking your mom seriously,” I said. “You’re the one not taking me seriously.”

At this point, I knew I was on the verge of losing my faith in gaining Bri’s approval. I could not convince anyone that was already convinced. Besides, I was a man after all. If I could not take home my woman, the least I could have was an unshattered pride.

“Is that true, Bud?” Lyn’s voice darted my guts.

“Of course not.” I should leave while I could still keep my mouth shut.

“Why would Chris lie about that?” Bri asked. “Why–”

“Bri, that’s enough,” Joey said.

Until everyone in that kubo had something to say. Something about me. Bri insisted that I was a fuck boy that hits and run. Lyn kept asking me to speak up. Joey, well, she probably regretted going with. The voices grew loud but my inner monologues grew louder. I no longer wanted to explain. I was an alpha male. I had kept my mouth shut, I could still keep it in. I could… Who was I fooling?

“I’m a virgin!” My voice earned their silence.

“Wha–”

“I am a raging romantic that never got laid,” I explained. “Everybody got it?”

Bri, Joey, and Lyn looked at each other, dazed and confused. Lyn sat down. Joey sighed reaffirming, “huh.”

“Why–” Bri was at a loss for words– “why would Chris lie then?”

“Well, I don’t know, Bri.” I dragged her name as long as I could. “Maybe your first childhood crush had the biggest crush on your mom and got mad at me for not being rejected.”

Then I realized that was still a possibility, “…Yet.”

Joey spoke up, “What about the baby issue?”

“A co-worker that liked me owed me money and did not wanna pay,” I said. “Got upset when I ghosted her for your mom, so she faked a pregnancy rumor.”

Everybody was processing everything down. I know, for sure, Lyn sobered up. The sun was setting and I no longer had anything left to say, no pride left to protect. We all just sat there silently until Bri raised my 13th reason in the form of a question.

“So you’re a virgi–”

I ran to the shore. I stumbled on the hollow ground Bri was buried from earlier. I caught my breath and decided to sit. I could not look at the kubo; shame stiffened my neck. There were a lot of scenarios I had run down my mind about this day and what had unfolded still came as a shock. But at least, that was over. The sun was setting.

I was burying my face on my palms when a shadow fronted me. She raised my chin up, took away my palms from my face, and sat herself beside me. She fixed my sight to the horizon.

“About the rejecting,” Lyn said.

Just like that, my heart began racing again. I was no longer the cool guy. Just the embarrassment that pissed her daughter’s foot. Nothing could’ve prepared me from what she had said after.

“That’s not going to happen.”

 

***

Princess “Preng” Arguelles is a twenty-something Creative Writing major at the University of the Philippines Mindanao. She attempts to capture reality-based ordeals in her fiction

What Happened in El Mañana (Part 3)

Fiction by | February 19, 2023

I could swear Bri and Joey were looking at us from the far side of the shore. Their flirty splashes with each other became a wrestle on the sand before they were finished off by the waves that crashed the shore. But I was more concerned about cheering Lyn up than whatever Bri was thinking about us. I thought I was doing a pretty good job until Lyn leaned on my shoulder, burying her face on my sleeve. She was silent. But I could feel my sleeve getting wet. I could hear nothing but the shortness of her breath. I let her be for quite a while before I wrapped my arms around her. I would pat her shoulder then her head.

 “What would I do without you?” she asked. My thoughts, exactly.

“I only want to have fun with her, Bud.” She managed to ask me that even with her sharp breaths every word after another. Her voice changed from a strong chest voice to a nasally tone. “Well, the day’s not over yet so why don’t you have fun?” I told Lyn while massaging the nape of her neck, “This is your vacation too.”

A bulb lit her mind because she actually agreed with me. “You know what…” Lyn said as she grabbed one of the bottles of Soju Joey was carrying. Lyn shook the bottle. She always told me it was to wake up the alcoholic demon inside the bottle, “You’re right.”

But I was quite hesitant with the idea of Lyn becoming even remotely tipsy around her daughter here. On one hand, although alcohol really helped her lighten up and transformed her to a total goofball, it might worsen Bri’s hostility toward her. On the other hand, if what had begun went on further, she might break down in front of her Bri. I know for sure Lyn would not want to lower her walls down, especially in such a public place.

“What do you think?” Lyn asked as her swollen eyes twinkled. Even when she was crying, she was still beautiful.

“That is a really bad idea, Lyn,” I said to her and the light in her eyes was ready to flow out of her lids. “That’s a really bad idea if you don’t have ice. Let me see if I can buy some.”

It took me a while to finally manage to buy ice as I had to go outside of the resort itself. El Mañana had some but would not sell it to me for some reason. I was headed back to the kubo when I decided to have a little chat with Bri and Joey who were sunbathing. From the seaweed crown on their hair, I could tell they swam around the beach, perhaps from the farther left below El Mañana foot bridge where they could have space of their own. Bri had sunglasses on while Joey was burying her in the sand. I did not know how to interrupt best than to clear my throat loud enough.

“I know I’m not in the position to talk–”

Bri was always quick to interrupt.

“Right. You are in no position to talk,” She managed to articulate every single word in such a way that I was momentarily stunned. Bri was ready to drag Joey back to the foot bridge when I mustered up the courage to continue on.

“I may not know what your real issue is with your mother,” I said. Bri stopped, not looking at me. “But could you please cut her some slack? She’s trying, she arranged this, everything… just to be with you.”

While I was explaining, I realized I use my hands too much when I feel so strongly about what I was talking about. While I was talking, I saw Joey tell her, “Give it a listen.”

My voice broke a bit, which was pretty embarrassing, but this is for Lyn. I cleared my throat, took a breath before continuing,  “So why don’t you give her a chance?”

I did not waste a second and started walking away before I felt a tear escape my eye.

“What makes you think my mom was my issue?” she asked behind my back. “If I did not make it clear enough, my problem is you.”

I froze where I stood as I heard Bri invite Joey back under the bridge. How could Bri have such a handsome problem?

When I was no longer paralyzed by Bri’s sass, I was finally ready to go back to the kubo when I heard Bri scream. I initially stepped towards the direction of the couple but if I did not go back to the kubo, all the ice I would give Lyn was water. So I rushed back.

At the kubo, Lyn had already taken a nap. It was no surprise that Joey’s screaming did not wake her because she had always been a heavy sleeper. I placed the ice on the ice bucket and glanced at the bridge. As my eyes scanned, I noticed Bri was helping Joey walk to the comfort room.

I knocked on the only locked cubicle door when I heard Bri. “What?”

“I heard you scream, are you okay?” I asked.

“How could anyone screaming be okay?” She clapped back. “How stupid could you be?”

I knew she was the daughter of the woman I want to spend my sunsets with but if she did not stop talking down on me, I would honestly find it hard to grow my balls back… I want her to like me for her mom so much, I would still cave.

“She stepped on something sharp,” Joey said.

I had a feeling of what it might have been. “Can I see?”

“If you don’t say something stupid,” Bri said. When Joey helped her extend her leg out of the cubicle I immediately recognized the black spike.

“We have to pee on it,” I said.

“That’s it, you’re out.” Bri brushed me away. She must have thought I was fooling around. “Piss off.”

“Gladly,” I replied. “Any way I could help.”

I unzipped my shorts, comfortable that the resort was private and Bri and Joey were inside the cubicle. I aimed my piss gun toward Bri’s foot when she tried pushing the spike out with her hand. I swerved it away from the initial target but not before my golden shower hit her hand.

“Is that–” Bri took a second to realize– “Ahh!! Damak!”

I apologized in a hundred languages and Bri was still inconsolable. I could hear Joey muffling her chuckles but Bri was not having it. She opened the door after I hurriedly put my shorts on. Her eyes had a laser beam.

“What did you just do?” she asked.

I answered, “I cured it.”

“Cured it?” Bri was livid. “When I told you to piss off, I- you, aaah!”

She was mad she could barely put out a sentence so I explained that she had stepped on a tuyom and peeing on it was what would get rid of the sting. I had to do it while rinsing her hand with water. She refused to let me touch her so I had to help from a distance. Joey was still laughing inside the cubicle.

“What did mama ever see in you?” Bri slammed the door.

I felt a lump in my throat. Out of all Bri had said to me, those words stung. “What can’t you see in me?” I mumbled.

Bri replied, “What was that?” And all of a sudden, I could feel the lump slid down my tongue.

“What is your deal? What’s with all your taray? You, of all people, should be happy! Your mother loves you. You have a girlfriend that loves you. Your mother loves that someone loves you. You’re so angry for someone who has a girlfriend. I don’t even have a girlfriend! I’m trying to. So why can’t we just skip pause with this teenage angst and be adults so I could finally be laid.”

As embarrassing as my thoughts spiraled out, it silenced Bri. I had not noticed Joey was already out of the cubicle. When she was out, Bri did so too. Bri took a step, wanting to walk away from me. I was embarrassed and upset that I could not look at her. When she took another step, I could not bear it anymore and did the impossible. I lend her my jesus flops. She was barefooted.

To be continued…

 

***

Princess “Preng” Arguelles is a twenty-something Creative Writing major at the University of the Philippines Mindanao. She attempts to capture reality-based ordeals in her fiction.

ayaw intawon kalimti

Poetry by | February 19, 2023

petsa kinse na
sa dominggo
nga gikahinaman
aron mauli na gyod
ang hinulamang kagoran
ay hinigugma

hagbay rang
gikabay-an
durong kagod
sa gipabuak mong lubi

wa mo igsapayan
iyang pagkumot
ug ang pagkasapal
sa imong dungog
hangtod nisamot

kaispiso ang tunô
sarang ikaligo
dugang sa luha

Si Gerwin Vic Evarretta Bhuyo usa ka magtutudlo nga OFW sa Bangkok, Thailand. Kinaham niya ang pagkuha og mga hulagway, pagsulat og balak ug sugilanon. Kon walay kakulian, magyampungad ni siya sa mga ipahigayong book sale event.